Becoming the Person they Hate (PT 2).
He does the "scan" and says "no I'm having a hard time handling anything about you." Cute little play on words. We went back inside before my family woke up. I apologized for my sexual aggressive side, and told him the truth about the mental arousal from the psychological exhibitionism. Then he went home.
I love pushing my neighbour's buttons. Especially because I know they're these two teenagers who act cool around me, but get off on the way I tease them. I go into my balcony into my towel soaking wet, and watch as they try to cover up their boners while playing basketball. I tan in my bikini and watch them do the same thing. Even if they knew they could get into bed with me - they'd be too stupid, scared and oblivious to take that chance.
I have wild conversations on the phone and watch them wonder. Giving them something to talk about is where I derive my pleasure. I emphasize the sway in my hips, mess up my hair to make it look like I just got out of bed, and make them know they'll never get it. Each time they see me, I'm a new person. It confuses and pisses them off which I love.
When I did all that stuff BA knew about, he sat there and took it like a little bitch and made passive aggressive comments about my behaviour. Sometimes I would get into his car and play with myself and make him watch. After I finish off, I would drive off. I know - I enjoy scandal and instigate. So what? It's who I am. I'm not hurting anyone? I'm giving them what they want. A woman to show them a distant sexual, psychological and romantic interest, even if it's vague. The pain they receive from knowing they can't obtain my mind and body ironically increase their psychological and probably sexual pleasure. People want to wonder who I am, in fact I'm wondering the same thing right now. I let them.
However, I'm selective about the circumstances, and people I would do this to. For example, I wouldn't tease a married, or a man who is involved (knowingly).
I get off on pushing people's buttons. Shocking them. Having them ask "what the hell is wrong with me"? I love it when people try to tell me who I should be, then going against every single thing they've said and watching them become furious and bitter. Destroying people's good girl perception of me arouses me beyond levels that are sexual. That's the thing, all these people can hate me but they'll always absorb it and watch. And even if they're distant, they're still trying to find a way to lurk...
Again, I'm not hurting anyone. Control freaks who want to impose their will on me, need to exercise their control freak muscle. But what's lifting weights without the resistance? That's where I come in. If I complied to their ideals, they couldn't flex their control freak muscle.
Everyone wins. I can show them (for a short period of time) that they are allowed to project onto me. Subtract, and you can flex the control freak muscle with the heaviest amount of weight you so choose.
I know my neighbours talk. Now they can add more strange, sinister adjectives to describe my character. Have fun compiling that list neighbour!
I love pushing my neighbour's buttons. Especially because I know they're these two teenagers who act cool around me, but get off on the way I tease them. I go into my balcony into my towel soaking wet, and watch as they try to cover up their boners while playing basketball. I tan in my bikini and watch them do the same thing. Even if they knew they could get into bed with me - they'd be too stupid, scared and oblivious to take that chance.
I have wild conversations on the phone and watch them wonder. Giving them something to talk about is where I derive my pleasure. I emphasize the sway in my hips, mess up my hair to make it look like I just got out of bed, and make them know they'll never get it. Each time they see me, I'm a new person. It confuses and pisses them off which I love.
When I did all that stuff BA knew about, he sat there and took it like a little bitch and made passive aggressive comments about my behaviour. Sometimes I would get into his car and play with myself and make him watch. After I finish off, I would drive off. I know - I enjoy scandal and instigate. So what? It's who I am. I'm not hurting anyone? I'm giving them what they want. A woman to show them a distant sexual, psychological and romantic interest, even if it's vague. The pain they receive from knowing they can't obtain my mind and body ironically increase their psychological and probably sexual pleasure. People want to wonder who I am, in fact I'm wondering the same thing right now. I let them.
However, I'm selective about the circumstances, and people I would do this to. For example, I wouldn't tease a married, or a man who is involved (knowingly).
I get off on pushing people's buttons. Shocking them. Having them ask "what the hell is wrong with me"? I love it when people try to tell me who I should be, then going against every single thing they've said and watching them become furious and bitter. Destroying people's good girl perception of me arouses me beyond levels that are sexual. That's the thing, all these people can hate me but they'll always absorb it and watch. And even if they're distant, they're still trying to find a way to lurk...
Again, I'm not hurting anyone. Control freaks who want to impose their will on me, need to exercise their control freak muscle. But what's lifting weights without the resistance? That's where I come in. If I complied to their ideals, they couldn't flex their control freak muscle.
Everyone wins. I can show them (for a short period of time) that they are allowed to project onto me. Subtract, and you can flex the control freak muscle with the heaviest amount of weight you so choose.
I know my neighbours talk. Now they can add more strange, sinister adjectives to describe my character. Have fun compiling that list neighbour!
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