Different Identities

I can't believe I am continuously writing on here like a mad man. In fact, right now I feel like a mad man. I read over the first post about my recurring nightmare. Trying to figure this entire thing out so I can have a good night's rest. The part where the man in my dream wrote "I can't believe you've left me for another man - THAT DAY," What day? Yes, I've had a past where I have mistreated a partner's trust but I haven't done it this time. Well, I'm not dating anyone but seriously - I wouldn't go out, cheat or see any other people if I started seeing someone/got into something serious. I'll stay loyal and have done in the past. I have/had no temptations whatsoever to cheat on BA, even Logan when we were seeing each other. I didn't even see anyone when I met Robert. I'm a one man woman. Does that even make sense??? Is my mind just trying to come to terms with what I've done in the past??? I'm still shook. Yes, I kn...

Okay so that eerie feeling just came over me again but I'm awake this time. I don't know who this man is, and again - I am hoping this is accumulating guilt I need to heal and deal with. This mystery man is unfortunately still a mystery man. In some ways he represents what my guilt comprises of. In the past I have experienced precognitive dreams, and they were never good. The dreams were always of death. I've had some amazing dreams that came true, but the ones that comprised of death happened to come true. That's why I'm so conflicted right now. Whoever mystery man is, please don't kill yourself over a girl (and if it's me -I'm so sorry), but it and never is worth it. I hope I can help you and make you want to live more than want to leave this world. You are needed here.

I didn't like sleeping to begin with, but now I despise sleeping even more. Why? Because of my recurring nightmares that continue to happen every single damn night. There are several variations of my nightmares but here is one of the most frightening one (to this date - I'm sure some other nightmare can potentially beat it).  Starts off with me waking up to a very dark room. A man's back is turned to me but I can't identify who it really is... An incredibly dreadful feeling comes over me as I realize I have no idea where I am. Who was this man? Why am I here? My fight or flight mode is starting to kick in, as I am sensing immense danger about to unfold. Again, the man's back is still turned to me. All I can gather is he is tall. I get up, and he doesn't acknowledge I'm out of the bed or my entire existence. It's almost as if I'm a ghost. He begins to sob, the sobbing becomes deeper and he buries his face in his hands. As he's sobbing he's ...

Isn't a lovely day to experience a glitch in the matrix? No one knows for sure why some people experience glitches. We all have our theories. Could we be living in a simulation? Parallel universes?? No one knows for sure. Whatever the cause may be - here are some of mine. The other day I was at the movie theatre and watched the movie It. Something was strange about that day, I kept having eerie feelings but didn't know why. Was something bizzare about to happen? I left in the middle of the movie for the bathroom. I go into the washroom and again, that eerie feeling hit me harder. I got out of the washroom stall and suddenly the washroom's appearance had changed. The walls were painted brown instead of beige when I initially walked in, and its length expanded.. I was confused and made sure I was in the right washroom - meaning I was actually in the women's washroom. I was -because other women were there washing their hands, and fixing their makeup etc. I shake it off, t...

I haven't been experimenting with new identities. Well I have, but not deliberately going out, trying to meet people and experiment with new personalities. I've been doing it on my own time, bringing out specific personalities/traits when the perfect circumstance calls for it. Daily activities/errands have made it difficult and undesirable to meet new people. I've discovered that playing around with new personalities/traits on my time has established growth. This is because if I rely on other people to bring out specific traits and/or personalities - the growth will be more external than internal. Internal change and experiments are what I was aiming for. It was also hard for me to go out and meet people just because they would want to keep in touch and I'd already lied about my life/was just experimenting with different personalities. Sometimes I don't want to keep in touch with specific people I've met during my experiment periods so I hold myself to the lie...

Hey everyone, I've been going through a transition, discovering who I am, and what is no longer serving me. This means friendships have been terminated, inner truths have been revealed, behavioural patterns are dying, and now I'm going through this period where I have no idea who I am. Therapy will do this to you, but that's a good thing. Things are fantastic but a bit rough. There's a lot of confusion on my end. I'm not reacting or responding to things the way I used to. In fact, I'm not reacting at all. It feels like all of the life has been sucked out of me, and I know I'm going into an isolation. I wonder if I should change my number, change all the locks to my floor and live life away from any human contact. From what I gather, I'm going through a depression which feels unbearable. Let's talk about Scarlett Kennedy. The Scarlett Kennedy persona is dying, and burnt out. She's done with men completely, wants nothing to do with anyone and...

Low and behold as we dive deep into the abyss of young officer Logan's  mind as he battles through feelings of intense displeasure. Along side is his trusty partner officer Edwards who feeds the intense displeasure with donuts, black coffee, daily moral affirmations and the like. By day officer Logan is fighting crime, bringing justice to his community,  rejecting and regretting  grand sexual favors from women he saves from men like him. By night,  he is Logan. Just Logan - without the uniform he experiences a deep sorrow that comes from taking off the uniform - his only identity he's proud of. His romantic interest, Scarlett Kennedy is also his arch nemesis. Scarlett Kennedy hides under a disguise: a woman's  body she had skinned and preserved for 21 cold blooded years. Her victims are men of wealth, affluence, power and status. She lures them with her proclaimed seductive gaze, but once in her bed - Scarlett reveals her true self. A green eyed monster, ...